Dear Birdies who frequent my feeders,
I had hoped it wouldn't come down to this, for we had a pretty amicable deal going. You, birds of all types, race, genders and sexualities, could eat from my feeders whenever you were hungry. In turn, I would be serenaded by your cheerful chirps, your witty banter and the various flutterings of wings or general tomfoolery.
But, as most situations, some birds spoiled it for the whole group (or perhaps, flock).
I feel the necessity to draw up this contract because recent evidence has shown a general disrespect for my time, possessions and generosity.
I ask that you respectfully follow these guidelines from this point forward or refrain from frequenting my feeders. I will not apologize for any curse words or objects I hurl at offenders.
My requests are simple and not too taxing.
1. Eat from the feeder, and stop throwing the seed on the ground. This is more so a problem with the South feeder. Should you see anyone eating carelessly please reprimand them. Remember, small actions do truly make a difference. Also, feel free to eat any seed that has fallen from the feeder. Look past any barbaric trapping you may have about this and consider this "roughing it."
2. After enjoying your meal or snack, fly away from my property or in the very least, find yourself a tree before using the "restroom." I expect not see any "accidents" on my driveway, front door, back step or car from this point forward. If you need to do your business, by all means, visit the neighbors.
I realize I have responsibility in this relationship but feel as though I have upheld my side. Feeders are filled promptly when they start getting low. I do my part to keep your bird bath water fresh.
Really, these are my only requests. I am disappointed I need to fill the feeder every week when I see all the wasted seed on the ground. And I don't need any sunflowers planted, so don't use that excuse. I enjoy your company but am starting to weigh the expense of wasted seed and cleaning supplies over an MP3 of singing birds and a study in feathers and wings screensaver.
Consider these points and note I'm not going to be so flexible if these problems persist. While you're at it, have a chat with dear little bunny who gorges himself on my flower beds. His fluffy little cotton tail won't save his ass much longer.
Sincerely,
the hand that feeds you
Wednesday, June 24, 2009
Sunday, June 21, 2009
Time, why you punish me?
I love my feet. Probably more than someone should love their own feet. They are the perfect shape and proportion. A perfect nail for each perfectly shaped toe. The love extends so deeply because it's the only part of my body that I feel this way, or anywhere close.
My beautiful feet are somewhat rare in my house and extended family. My family has a strong history of bunions. Most of my aunts on my mom's side suffer from them. And over the years I've seen it destroy my mom's feet.
Bunions, other than hereditary, are caused in part from the shoes you wear, namely tight and pointy shoes. Which I avoid. LIKE THE PLAGUE.
So imagine my complete and utter distress when I realized my feet were changing.
It happened one night last year. I believe it was around my birthday, which probably set off the quarterlife crisis. We were watching TV and out of the corner of my eye I noticed my foot looked different. There was a bit of rounding on the side past my big toe.
No. It can't be. I had been so careful, but life had caught up with me. My stupid genes (no offense, Mom & Dad) had screwed me over once again.
Because there it was, the start of a bunion. And then came the tears. Silently they flowed for probably two hours. Once or twice my mom looked over and finally confirmed it.
"What's wrong, why are you crying?"
My feet. .... bunions.
With an inspection, she said the absolute wrong thing to comfort me. She confirmed I had them.
More tears.
Then the rest of the night I was inconsolable as she wondered out loud what the big deal was and why I was so upset. And then said it was because of toe cracking. Wondrous, airy, magnificent toe cracking.
My feet, my beatiful feet. Destroyed. Gone.
Later that summer my aunt Joannie said they weren't very noticeable and maybe if I stayed with sensible shoes it wouldn't develop until years later. That made me feel better. THAT'S what Mom should have said.
This year, my toes started tingling, aching and burning at night. Dammit.
Well after three days I went to the store and bought everything I could find that was a toe spacer or cushion. Then I switched to flats. FLATS.
Goodbye couple extra inches; Hello yes I'm really this short.
After two weeks of constant babying my feet felt normal again. Is it mostly in my head? Perhaps. Are my feet still straight and mostly bump free? Thankfully, yes.
Sadly though, I'm nowhere as carefree as I was a little over a year ago.
My beautiful feet are somewhat rare in my house and extended family. My family has a strong history of bunions. Most of my aunts on my mom's side suffer from them. And over the years I've seen it destroy my mom's feet.
Bunions, other than hereditary, are caused in part from the shoes you wear, namely tight and pointy shoes. Which I avoid. LIKE THE PLAGUE.
So imagine my complete and utter distress when I realized my feet were changing.
It happened one night last year. I believe it was around my birthday, which probably set off the quarterlife crisis. We were watching TV and out of the corner of my eye I noticed my foot looked different. There was a bit of rounding on the side past my big toe.
No. It can't be. I had been so careful, but life had caught up with me. My stupid genes (no offense, Mom & Dad) had screwed me over once again.
Because there it was, the start of a bunion. And then came the tears. Silently they flowed for probably two hours. Once or twice my mom looked over and finally confirmed it.
"What's wrong, why are you crying?"
My feet. .... bunions.
With an inspection, she said the absolute wrong thing to comfort me. She confirmed I had them.
More tears.
Then the rest of the night I was inconsolable as she wondered out loud what the big deal was and why I was so upset. And then said it was because of toe cracking. Wondrous, airy, magnificent toe cracking.
My feet, my beatiful feet. Destroyed. Gone.
Later that summer my aunt Joannie said they weren't very noticeable and maybe if I stayed with sensible shoes it wouldn't develop until years later. That made me feel better. THAT'S what Mom should have said.
This year, my toes started tingling, aching and burning at night. Dammit.
Well after three days I went to the store and bought everything I could find that was a toe spacer or cushion. Then I switched to flats. FLATS.
Goodbye couple extra inches; Hello yes I'm really this short.
After two weeks of constant babying my feet felt normal again. Is it mostly in my head? Perhaps. Are my feet still straight and mostly bump free? Thankfully, yes.
Sadly though, I'm nowhere as carefree as I was a little over a year ago.
Monday, June 15, 2009
Five reasons why the dishes don't get done
I don't read as many books since my discovery of blogs and RSS feeds. I think college and 100+ pages due per class, per day destroyed the reading for enjoyment part of my brain too. But it's gone a step (or two, or a leap) beyond that ... I have to pay attention to my Internet time otherwise I could spend endless hours engrossed in all the wonders it holds.
I love finding little gems or discovering the ultra-trendy site that everyone else in various trendy circles knows about. To make this list, I narrowed it to blogs I read faithfully and those that update frequently (this knocked off Grey Matter--from the Writers of Grey's Anatomy, since they don't post when the show is in hiatus).
I am also only including the sites I've been reading for at least six months (which eliminated my new find from Dooce's Twitter feed: Favrd--and no, it's not about THAT quarterback.
So with no further ado, here is a brief list of my favorites.
Dooce.com -- a "Mommy" blog that's so much more. This blog chronicles the life of Heather B. Armstrong, wife and mother of two (as of Saturday). A former Mormon who got fired from her LA job in web design for writing about work on her blog. She and her new husband moved back to Utah even though their political views and drinking habits are polar opposites of their former faith. After having her first child, she committed herself to a mental hospital with a severe case of postpartum depression (as noted on her blog and new book).
I discovered this blog from a copy writing e-newsletter. It mentioned her blog along with about four or five other "Mommy Blogs." I don't know why I clicked this link, but what I read had me captivated.
The first post I read was about Halloween 2008 (I'd post a link, but there's a lot of lag on her web site right now b/c she just posted the announcement for their new daughter), I loved it instantly and went back to the beginning of the site, via archives and read from there. Six months later, I finally am up to date and on to reading her husband's site. He is more politically and geek oriented (said with love of course) and it's just as enjoyable to read Jon's point of view as things unfold in the Armstrong household.
PostSecret -- Published Sunday mornings, this site is a community art/social project where people send in post cards with their secrets. These post cards are elaborately designed homemade masterpieces, photographs or the typical tourist post card.
This site is interesting on many levels. Sometimes its the beauty of the cards and the amazing talent of their artists. Sometimes its the outrageous secrets--confessions of silly, fun or naughty little things people do. Like the person who puts your insurance claim at the bottom of the pile when he/she can't read your writing. THAT changed how much I pay attention to my penmanship.
The most striking aspect of this site is the heart-wrenching or devastating statements of abuse, rape, depression, addiction, and every so often, love. I've cried more than once reading these short, but meaningful secrets.
I found this site by a search after watching an episode of CSI:NY. It wasn't the same site featured on the show, but it had the same concept of sending secrets on homemade cards for the world to see but no one to know.
A site I found from PostSecret, Found is somewhat similar as it gives you a glimpse of a fraction of a stranger's life. This site displays found items people send in. It's amazing the things people find and where they find them: on the street, sidewalk, parking lot, benches, attics, books, elevators and on and on and on.
The found items are typically old and interesting photographs or odd notes, which are a hoot.
TXTS FRM LST NGHT -- I came across this site from Mark Hoppus' blog (which is another blog and/or Twitter feed you should hook into). The name is pretty self explanatory. Amusing texts from every day life that people then send to the site to be published. Not surprisingly, many of these texts are from intoxicated people. But if we can't be amused from their stupidity, what's the point??
Finally, I also frequently check $5 Dinners. This Mommy blogger writes about her tips and strategies to feed her family on five dollars a meal. I'm looking for ideas and tips moreso than actually reading this blog like I read Dooce. The creater of $5 Dinners outlines menu plans, has great, inexpensive and healthy recipe ideas and coupons. I don't often get to the coupons in time, but she has great variety in her recipes and I've used around five of her recipes and adapted many others.
I discovered this site from Blogs of Note, a list of interesting sites updated monthly from the staff of Blogger.
So those are my favs. Add movies and tv shows, music, the Dan Patrick Show and the occasional game you can understand why I have to be careful about my Internet time at home. But hot damn, with high speed there are so many possibilites!
What are your favorite sites/blogs? I'm always looking for a new addiction...err...something to read.
I love finding little gems or discovering the ultra-trendy site that everyone else in various trendy circles knows about. To make this list, I narrowed it to blogs I read faithfully and those that update frequently (this knocked off Grey Matter--from the Writers of Grey's Anatomy, since they don't post when the show is in hiatus).
I am also only including the sites I've been reading for at least six months (which eliminated my new find from Dooce's Twitter feed: Favrd--and no, it's not about THAT quarterback.
So with no further ado, here is a brief list of my favorites.
Dooce.com -- a "Mommy" blog that's so much more. This blog chronicles the life of Heather B. Armstrong, wife and mother of two (as of Saturday). A former Mormon who got fired from her LA job in web design for writing about work on her blog. She and her new husband moved back to Utah even though their political views and drinking habits are polar opposites of their former faith. After having her first child, she committed herself to a mental hospital with a severe case of postpartum depression (as noted on her blog and new book).
I discovered this blog from a copy writing e-newsletter. It mentioned her blog along with about four or five other "Mommy Blogs." I don't know why I clicked this link, but what I read had me captivated.
The first post I read was about Halloween 2008 (I'd post a link, but there's a lot of lag on her web site right now b/c she just posted the announcement for their new daughter), I loved it instantly and went back to the beginning of the site, via archives and read from there. Six months later, I finally am up to date and on to reading her husband's site. He is more politically and geek oriented (said with love of course) and it's just as enjoyable to read Jon's point of view as things unfold in the Armstrong household.
PostSecret -- Published Sunday mornings, this site is a community art/social project where people send in post cards with their secrets. These post cards are elaborately designed homemade masterpieces, photographs or the typical tourist post card.
This site is interesting on many levels. Sometimes its the beauty of the cards and the amazing talent of their artists. Sometimes its the outrageous secrets--confessions of silly, fun or naughty little things people do. Like the person who puts your insurance claim at the bottom of the pile when he/she can't read your writing. THAT changed how much I pay attention to my penmanship.
The most striking aspect of this site is the heart-wrenching or devastating statements of abuse, rape, depression, addiction, and every so often, love. I've cried more than once reading these short, but meaningful secrets.
I found this site by a search after watching an episode of CSI:NY. It wasn't the same site featured on the show, but it had the same concept of sending secrets on homemade cards for the world to see but no one to know.
A site I found from PostSecret, Found is somewhat similar as it gives you a glimpse of a fraction of a stranger's life. This site displays found items people send in. It's amazing the things people find and where they find them: on the street, sidewalk, parking lot, benches, attics, books, elevators and on and on and on.
The found items are typically old and interesting photographs or odd notes, which are a hoot.
TXTS FRM LST NGHT -- I came across this site from Mark Hoppus' blog (which is another blog and/or Twitter feed you should hook into). The name is pretty self explanatory. Amusing texts from every day life that people then send to the site to be published. Not surprisingly, many of these texts are from intoxicated people. But if we can't be amused from their stupidity, what's the point??
Finally, I also frequently check $5 Dinners. This Mommy blogger writes about her tips and strategies to feed her family on five dollars a meal. I'm looking for ideas and tips moreso than actually reading this blog like I read Dooce. The creater of $5 Dinners outlines menu plans, has great, inexpensive and healthy recipe ideas and coupons. I don't often get to the coupons in time, but she has great variety in her recipes and I've used around five of her recipes and adapted many others.
I discovered this site from Blogs of Note, a list of interesting sites updated monthly from the staff of Blogger.
So those are my favs. Add movies and tv shows, music, the Dan Patrick Show and the occasional game you can understand why I have to be careful about my Internet time at home. But hot damn, with high speed there are so many possibilites!
What are your favorite sites/blogs? I'm always looking for a new addiction...err...something to read.
Tuesday, June 9, 2009
Make You Smile +44 (My life as told by my music)
A friend did this on facebook and her answers were perfect and hilarious. Mine, not as much, but somewhat amusing.
My Life As Told By *Generic MP3 Player*
1. Put your iTunes, IPod or Windows Music Player on shuffle.
2. For each question, press the next button to get your next answer.
1. IF SOMEONE SAYS, “IS THIS OKAY?” YOU SAY
Geek in Pink - Jason Mraz
2. WHAT WOULD BEST DESCRIBE YOUR PERSONALITY?
Curbside Profit - Jason Mraz
3. WHAT DO YOU LIKE IN A GUY/GIRL?
Seasons of Love - Rent Soundtrack
4. WHAT IS YOUR LIFE’S PURPOSE?
Love Song for No One - John Mayer (that's not a huge stamp of confidence)
5. WHAT IS YOUR MOTTO?
You Found Me - The Fray
6. WHAT DO YOUR FRIENDS THINK OF YOU?
I'm OK - Christina Aguilera
7. WHAT DO YOU THINK ABOUT OFTEN?
Circus - Britney Spears
8. WHAT DO YOU THINK OF YOUR BEST FRIEND?
Infatuation - Christina Aguilera
9. WHAT DO YOU THINK OF THE PERSON YOU LIKE?
Trees - Marty Casey
10. WHAT IS YOUR LIFE STORY?
The Man Who Sold the World - Nirvana
11. WHAT DO YOU WANT TO BE WHEN YOU GROW UP?
Shut Up - Blink-182
12. WHAT DO YOU THINK WHEN YOU SEE THE PERSON YOU LIKE?
Comfortable - John Mayer
13. WHAT DO YOUR PARENTS THINK OF YOU?
Here is Gone - The Goo Goo Dolls
14. WHAT WILL YOU DANCE TO AT YOUR WEDDING?
Broken - Seether Feat. Amy Lee
15. WHAT WILL THEY PLAY AT YOUR FUNERAL?
Going Away to College - Blink-182
16. WHAT IS YOUR HOBBY/INTEREST?
Addicted - Saving Abel
17. WHAT DO YOU THINK OF YOUR FRIENDS?
No, It Isn't - +44
18. WHAT’S THE WORST THING THAT COULD HAPPEN?
Ever The Same - Rob Thomas
19. HOW WILL YOU DIE?
Right Here - Staind
20. WHAT IS THE ONE THING YOU REGRET?
Photograph - Nickelback
21. WHAT MAKES YOU LAUGH?
Weatherman - +44
22. WHAT MAKES YOU CRY?
Elizabeth - Jonathan Jackson
23. WHAT SCARES YOU THE MOST?
Apologize - One Republic feat Timberland
24. DOES ANYONE LIKE YOU?
Rockin' the Suburbs - Ben Folds Five
25. IF YOU COULD GO BACK IN TIME, WHAT WOULD YOU CHANGE?
My Love - Justin Timberlake
26. WHAT HURTS RIGHT NOW?
Here Without You - 3 Doors Down
27. WHAT WILL YOU POST THIS AS?
Make You Smile - +44
My Life As Told By *Generic MP3 Player*
1. Put your iTunes, IPod or Windows Music Player on shuffle.
2. For each question, press the next button to get your next answer.
1. IF SOMEONE SAYS, “IS THIS OKAY?” YOU SAY
Geek in Pink - Jason Mraz
2. WHAT WOULD BEST DESCRIBE YOUR PERSONALITY?
Curbside Profit - Jason Mraz
3. WHAT DO YOU LIKE IN A GUY/GIRL?
Seasons of Love - Rent Soundtrack
4. WHAT IS YOUR LIFE’S PURPOSE?
Love Song for No One - John Mayer (that's not a huge stamp of confidence)
5. WHAT IS YOUR MOTTO?
You Found Me - The Fray
6. WHAT DO YOUR FRIENDS THINK OF YOU?
I'm OK - Christina Aguilera
7. WHAT DO YOU THINK ABOUT OFTEN?
Circus - Britney Spears
8. WHAT DO YOU THINK OF YOUR BEST FRIEND?
Infatuation - Christina Aguilera
9. WHAT DO YOU THINK OF THE PERSON YOU LIKE?
Trees - Marty Casey
10. WHAT IS YOUR LIFE STORY?
The Man Who Sold the World - Nirvana
11. WHAT DO YOU WANT TO BE WHEN YOU GROW UP?
Shut Up - Blink-182
12. WHAT DO YOU THINK WHEN YOU SEE THE PERSON YOU LIKE?
Comfortable - John Mayer
13. WHAT DO YOUR PARENTS THINK OF YOU?
Here is Gone - The Goo Goo Dolls
14. WHAT WILL YOU DANCE TO AT YOUR WEDDING?
Broken - Seether Feat. Amy Lee
15. WHAT WILL THEY PLAY AT YOUR FUNERAL?
Going Away to College - Blink-182
16. WHAT IS YOUR HOBBY/INTEREST?
Addicted - Saving Abel
17. WHAT DO YOU THINK OF YOUR FRIENDS?
No, It Isn't - +44
18. WHAT’S THE WORST THING THAT COULD HAPPEN?
Ever The Same - Rob Thomas
19. HOW WILL YOU DIE?
Right Here - Staind
20. WHAT IS THE ONE THING YOU REGRET?
Photograph - Nickelback
21. WHAT MAKES YOU LAUGH?
Weatherman - +44
22. WHAT MAKES YOU CRY?
Elizabeth - Jonathan Jackson
23. WHAT SCARES YOU THE MOST?
Apologize - One Republic feat Timberland
24. DOES ANYONE LIKE YOU?
Rockin' the Suburbs - Ben Folds Five
25. IF YOU COULD GO BACK IN TIME, WHAT WOULD YOU CHANGE?
My Love - Justin Timberlake
26. WHAT HURTS RIGHT NOW?
Here Without You - 3 Doors Down
27. WHAT WILL YOU POST THIS AS?
Make You Smile - +44
Friday, June 5, 2009
This is it. It might all be gone tomorrow
This season of Grey's Anatomy is in the high form not seen since Prom Night of the Adulterous Sex, Denny's death and the night Snow Patrol was put on the map.
The magic is back.
The writing is quick and witty. Each main character is rich and complex with story lines given the perfect amount of attention.
And it all started again with Izzy and Denny.
I've always enjoyed Denny and his relationship with Izzy. It was the beautiful fairytale with a Shakespearean ending. It's iconic moment, Izzy in her fantastic pink prom dress laying on Denny's death bed, her forehead pressed into his neck.
A great majority of people will not be able to hear strains of Snow Patrol-Chasing Cars without picturing that moment.
But much has changed at Seattle Grace since. That night was quite a turning point for our Interns. That night things stopped being so simple. So black and white. They learned science cannot always save them and their choices have irreversible consequences. You can't go back.
That night Izzy lost her way. Her whole world changed, collapsed, and she really hadn't found her way back until this season. Specifically, the moment she realized she was alone.
And then came Denny.
Not a lot of people liked that Izzy could see, talk to and ... with Denny. I loved it. This interaction brought back Izzy as she used to be: playful, vibrant.
She lost her strength and compassion. She lost her essence. But Denny, our dearly departed Denny helped her find it again.
And it led her to the clinic and the Interns. In teaching them she found a balance between the rockstar doctor and the sensitive-sometimes-over-the-line doctor.
She did such a good job engaging the Interns to take learning seriously--where everyone else had failed. She also played a part in helping Alex heal after yet another train wreck (Ava), Christina find a heart, Meredith commit to an extravagant wedding (which helped her learn that all she really wanted/needed was a good marriage) and George the strength to stand on his own feet.
Izzy touched all the key players of Seattle Grace -- just like we affect everything around us, in so many ways we'll probably never know.
But, I think Izzy's purpose has been fulfilled and she should die. What is there left for her to do? Because I can't see her growing old with Alex, and I realize there's plenty of more guys for her to sleep with, but really, been there, done that. If you hadn't noticed, Izzy has been whoring around. From Denny's death bed to a bathroom floor to destroying George's marriage to Alex on the rebound.
There's more left for George ... than there is for Izzy.
I've said it before. Writers can do anything. And I guess we'll just have to wait and see what the next season brings.
The magic is back.
The writing is quick and witty. Each main character is rich and complex with story lines given the perfect amount of attention.
And it all started again with Izzy and Denny.
I've always enjoyed Denny and his relationship with Izzy. It was the beautiful fairytale with a Shakespearean ending. It's iconic moment, Izzy in her fantastic pink prom dress laying on Denny's death bed, her forehead pressed into his neck.
A great majority of people will not be able to hear strains of Snow Patrol-Chasing Cars without picturing that moment.
But much has changed at Seattle Grace since. That night was quite a turning point for our Interns. That night things stopped being so simple. So black and white. They learned science cannot always save them and their choices have irreversible consequences. You can't go back.
That night Izzy lost her way. Her whole world changed, collapsed, and she really hadn't found her way back until this season. Specifically, the moment she realized she was alone.
And then came Denny.
Not a lot of people liked that Izzy could see, talk to and ... with Denny. I loved it. This interaction brought back Izzy as she used to be: playful, vibrant.
She lost her strength and compassion. She lost her essence. But Denny, our dearly departed Denny helped her find it again.
And it led her to the clinic and the Interns. In teaching them she found a balance between the rockstar doctor and the sensitive-sometimes-over-the-line doctor.
She did such a good job engaging the Interns to take learning seriously--where everyone else had failed. She also played a part in helping Alex heal after yet another train wreck (Ava), Christina find a heart, Meredith commit to an extravagant wedding (which helped her learn that all she really wanted/needed was a good marriage) and George the strength to stand on his own feet.
Izzy touched all the key players of Seattle Grace -- just like we affect everything around us, in so many ways we'll probably never know.
But, I think Izzy's purpose has been fulfilled and she should die. What is there left for her to do? Because I can't see her growing old with Alex, and I realize there's plenty of more guys for her to sleep with, but really, been there, done that. If you hadn't noticed, Izzy has been whoring around. From Denny's death bed to a bathroom floor to destroying George's marriage to Alex on the rebound.
There's more left for George ... than there is for Izzy.
I've said it before. Writers can do anything. And I guess we'll just have to wait and see what the next season brings.
Tuesday, June 2, 2009
In case I get eaten by a bear
Last.fm cares. That makes me feel good. Click on image to read the message.
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